22
Apr
Living with Fibromyalgia

Click here to sponsor me in this years Race for Life.

Back in 2001 I went through a lengthy period of being unwell. I had tonsillitis on and off for 3 months straight, which crashed my immune system, leaving me susceptible to every ailment floating in the air. Then one morning I woke with what looked and felt like a bee sting on the inside of my right knee. I left it for a week or so but as the swelling grew I ended up in A & E, who wrongly diagnosed…… a bee sting! After 6 weeks of incredible pain, unable to walk and struggling to even stand up right I made my way to the doctors surgery again and sat there for 4 hours until someone would see me. I eventually got in front of a locum doctor who made an instant diagnosis of Erythema Nodosum

This lead to weeks and weeks of tests, which identified an under active Thyroid gland that took months to treat with the right level of medication and of course whilst all this is going on I’m holding down a full time job, running a house full of kids and a demanding husband.

The upshot of all this lead me to a top rheumatologist as I think the NHS had literally run out of places to send me, tests they could run and had no idea what else to do with me! Thankfully after careful monitoring over 3 months (including keeping a daily pain chart, food and drink diary and an activity calendar) he made the proper diagnosis of Fibromyalgia. It’s more commonly heard of nowadays but when I was diagnosed there was so much controversy around it, as an imagined illness that was all in the mind.

I was lucky to have a consultant who truly believed that whilst Fibro can’t be cured, it can be controlled with medication and I was soon on 7 tablets a day to control it. He did however warn that I could be bed ridden or in need of a wheelchair by the time I turned 40 (I’m 41 and still active by the way.)

Stairs and going uphill became avoided at all costs, and that’s still the case today – you can frequently find me sat the top of a flight of stairs or going extremely  pale when I’ve walked up even the slightest gradient.

The hardest thing to deal with throughout all of this has been the constant tiredness that dogs me day in, day out. Chronic Fatigue is a bi-product of Fibro and the Thyroid problem, and it has changed the way I live my life so much.

So when I signed up for the Race for Life last year I knew I was taking on the biggest challenge of my life – but I also knew that if I committed to it mentally then my body would follow suit. It wasn’t easy, I was in tears the whole way round and it took me about a week to fully recover but do you know what? I was one of the first to sign up for it again this year when registration opened in January.

To beat / combat Fibro you have to have a strong, positive attitude. You have to WANT to get better and fight to stay mobile.

I recently discovered Matcha tea powder, not something I would normally do but it’s having an amazing effect on my energy levels and I haven’t felt this well or alive for years – I feel like I’ve woken from a very long sleep!  S

So I’m going to fully embrace this new lease of life and live every day to the max – life’s too short not to!

If you would like to sponsor me you can do so here – Race for Life

Are you a Fibro survivor? How do you cope with it? I’d love to hear from you below.

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22
Apr
The one featuring Kylie

There are times when you realise that you’re at a critical point in either your career or personal life, and it’s not very often that you get the chance to catch your breath and make the choices about which fork in the road you will go down.

Let me explain. I’ve been self employed since 2007, and since then I’ve been several incarnations – some through bad luck, some through poor decisions and some purely through necessity. As Kylie has changed and evolved throughout her 30 year pop career, so have I!  From a lady who lunches to a freelance journalist, magazine owner, business partner and finally where I am now – Head of Content and Director of a digital agency. But there are a few things that have remained constant regardless of whatever role I’ve played and that’s my core values; things that no matter how hard life gets I can pull my reserves and somehow get through. I’ve given a lot of thought to what they are and asked a few friends and family for 3 words they would use to describe me;

Spirited, determined, straight forward - my other half

Tenacious, resilient and a fighter – a business friend

Stubborn, driven and caring – my 19 year old son

Pretty powerful words! And these people have seen me at my best and at my very worst so I guess they know me well.

Since 2007 I have had to fight for every single wage packet I have ever allowed myself and for about 2 of those years I went completely without a salary at all. The little profit I had made was plowed back into a business venture that went sour and effectively in August last year I had to start again. Every single one of those attributes that people used to describe has been called into use this week, and I’m thankful that I have some fantastic support around me. At long last it would seem that things are actually starting to turn round for me and I cannot even begin to tell you how good that feels.

One thing for certain though – I’ll never take any success for granted!

P.S You should try the ’3 words to describe me’ exercise – it can be quite revealing!

Category: Head of Words, On reflection  Leave a Comment
31
Dec
Goodbye 2011, Hello 2012

What a year, where to start?!

Overall it’s not been too bad really, it’s been tough financially at times and I have had to get rid of one or two negative influences in my life but yes, overall not bad.

I think the major difference for this year was being introduced to Mark’s children. He has 2 girls, aged 5 and 2, with A being the oldest and J the youngest. We weathered a pretty rough storm at the back end of 2010 and into early 2011 but gradually everything calmed down.

It wasn’t plain sailing when we first met – A was very clearly confused by the situation and the hurt was maybe just a little too raw but we somehow managed to find our way. I acknowledged that I am quite territorial and there have been times when I felt like a stranger in my own home. We now know that I have to be in the house to greet them when they land on a Friday, and we have very clear house rules that help us all at times!

It’s been far easier with J but then she’s still a baby and until recently couldn’t talk!

They now have their own bedroom and bunk beds (which helped massively!) and today we took a girly shopping trip so that they don’t have to bring a suitcase with them every weekend. We think that will help them realise that this is as much their home as it is at their mums.

On the work front, we’re starting 2012 with a very clear idea of where we’re going, and what we want to achieve – total domination of Social Media, a modest ambition I feel :-)

So what of 2012 for me personally? It’s definitely the year of austerity measures in the Skeet-Yaffe house! A case of  judging everything by “Do we want it or do we need it?” It’s only for a year………. God help us!

I think / hope that Daniel will spend more time in Africa pursuing his dream of working on safari and that his girlfriend will allow him some time to go and discover the world for himself. I bought them a book of 101 greatest adventures for Christmas which I hope will be an inspiration for them.

Personally, I want to lose weight (don’t we all?!) and get back to the gym, feeling fit, well and healthy. I’d like to do the Race for Life again in July and I’d also like to spend more time in Scotland with my relatives.

I have no doubt whatsoever that Mark and I will continue to grow closer and go from strength to strength.

So Happy New Year to one and all – though we’ll probably be in bed for 10pm! x

 

 

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10
Dec
Let the festivities commence…..

2 parties in one week, get me!

The first was on Tuesday at the Alea Casino in Leeds for the Temple Spa Little Black Dress event. It was a great night, a real mix offashion and fun. Topless men were abound, free flowing champagne and designer handbags for sale, everything needed to ensure the night was a success.

 

 

The next party was on Thursday evening, with the wonderful ladies from Wakefield Women’s Business Brunch. I met most of these girls back in June, when Gill Laidler invited me along to a new networking meeting. At the initial meeting there were around 10 or 1 2 of us, all women in business looking to make new connections. Since then we have grown and keep growing. I’ve been networking for years now and I believe that word of mouth recommendation is the most powerful referral business you can ever get. I have however always stayed away from women only networking groups, due to a couple of bad experiences. The ones I had previously attended were more ‘twin set and pearls’ where exchanging business cards was frowned upon, or isolated home workers looking to just ‘make friends.’

This group is a million miles away from that. We now average around 35 women per monthly meeting and whatever it is we are doing, it’s working! There is already a substantial amount of business being exchanged between members, and what I love and what tells me we have the right formula is seeing the girls at the end of each meeting with their diaries open, making appointments to meet up and further the relationship.

It was really brought home to me on Thursday evening just how much we’ve grown, both individually and as a group. We were all absolutely comfortable in each others company, had no reservations about getting on the dance floor and letting ourselves go, and it was a hysterically, fun evening!

Massive thanks to Louise Wright at Oulton Hall for arranging the fabulous venue and food.

If you’re interested in coming along to next meeting, you can book online here.

Category: Head of Words  Leave a Comment
28
Nov
Gary Speed 1969 – 2011

At the weekend I heard the very sad news that footballing great and former LUFC hero Gary Speed had taken his own life.

I can’t believe how much this has affected me. It’s always sad when you hear of someone passing before their time, but my reaction was unprecedented. It wasn’t until I saw a picture on Facebook that I realised why.

In 1992 Leeds United won what was the last first division, and part of that team was Gary Speed. Along with Batty, Strachen, Sterland et al I lived and breathed Leeds that season. I was pregnant with Daniel and Daniels dad Paul was (and still is) a massive Leeds fan. We were part of Wilkos barmy army and stood at the terraces (even 6 months pregnant) and cheered them on. We even went to the Italian Restaurant Dino’s one night because we’d heard they were there!

The nostalgia and retrospective look back at the time marks a huge definition in my life and it changed forever that year.

I’m incredibly sad that one of our sporting hero’s felt so desperately low that he could see no future with him as a part of it. It just shows that you never know how someone’s mind works, no matter what goes on on the outside.

RIP Gary Speed, our thoughts are with your family.

The Samaritans: www.thesamaritans.org //08457 909090

Category: Head of Words, On reflection  Leave a Comment
25
Nov
The one where I end up in A & E….

I’ll give you a little background to the story before I begin my tale. I have 1 son, Daniel aged 19 (!). I struggled with motherhood in the early days, not with post-natal depression, not as serious as that, just un-organised, dishevelled and clueless! In truth I was 21 and could barely take care of myself when this little being was thrust upon me. What no one tells you when you’re pregnant is that at the end of this uncomfortable period of being fat you will lose yourself and any common sense that you ever held. That’s how it was for me anyway. We stumbled through childhood and teens, and quite frankly despite neither of us having a clue what we were doing we actually managed to get him to adult hood without too much trouble. When I say ‘we’ I mean Daniel and I, we have no one else to congratulate but ourselves!

The bond between us has been incredible. In turn we have been each others rock’s, best friend, worst influence, biggest supporter and chief tear drier. There has been times when we have answered each others unspoken questions, allied the others fears and been clowns just because we felt like it. We have felt the others pain when we’ve been nowhere near each other.

It should have come as no surprise then that earlier this week I had been speaking at an event and headed home but took several wrong turns and drove past the local hospital by mistake. No sooner had I passed the entrance than my phone beeped with a gory picture text from the boy, telling me that he was in the A & E department of the hospital that I had just that minute driven past. Within 2 minutes I was sat on his hospital bed watching him have his finger stitched back together!

Yes, you can put that down to coincidence but I don’t and I never will. There’s a bond between us that will never break, and even when he marries and has children of his own I know that the bond will always be there. Why? Because he’s my boy, that’s why.

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20
Nov
Photo’s, Spa and Chocolat

It has been one of the maddest, craziest weeks I’ve had in a loooong time! It started out ordinarily enough, but by Friday I had reached exhaustion although I did still manage to squeeze in Dinner with Joanne Harris on Friday evening.

On Tuesday Mark and I were having some PR shots taken by a photographer friend of ours, Paul Hodgson. Nothing unusual about that I know, only towards the end of the shoot Paul asked if  it was our intention to market our business as a “husband and wife” kind of company. Now I have nothing against that but it was a very strange notion after being a sole trader in both personal and professional life for so long. Paul took some fabulous photo’s, but on the one of us together it clearly shows my unease, and in one I actually look like I am pulling away from Mark – I’m sure relationship analysts would have a field day with it! I think it’s safe to say that those pics will never be used in public.

In the afternoon we were scheduled to finish early (I know, shock horror) and take a leisurely couple of days off to celebrate Mark’s birthday. Just as we were about to head out of the door I took a call from a potential new client that I had been to see on Monday morning. They were calling back to say that they were going to trial us on a project, with a view to taking more of their social media marketing on board if this initial campaign was successful. We were thrilled to say the least. Our business has been through a tricky time in the last 3  months and we have worked our backsides off pulling proposals together and pitching for new work. So our departure was delayed slightly, but for good reason – this campaign started with immediate effect!

We had a wonderful stay at the sumptuous Oulton Hall Hotel, and the spa treatments that we had on the Wednesday were perfect for recharging the batteries after a couple of weeks of illness. We’ve recently helped Oulton Hall launch into the world of blogging, so it was great to sample how fabulous it all is instead of just writing about it!

Thursday saw us up and off early to The Great British Business Show at Earls Court. I have to confess that I absolutely love exhibitions, both attending and exhibiting. There’s always a buzz about an exhibition hall and an air of anticipation. There’s no way of knowing just how busy it will be, what footfall to your stand will be like, and there’s always the possibility that you might even meet your next big client there! Our objective was to see what resources are available to an up and coming digital agency, check out new suppliers, look for existing suppliers and make sure we’re getting value for money. One of the biggest things that struck me as we walked round was how many stand holders were just letting people (potential clients) walk straight past without stopping them. You can’t be like that at a show. You have to be out front, interacting, engaging with passersby. It probably cost some of these businesses thousands of pounds just to be there, not to mention the expenses, hotel bills etc. I actually considered setting up a new business dedicated to training exhibition staff and sales people. Anyone fancy financing it just give me a shout!

We had a good day, spoke to lots of new contacts as well as catching up with a few friends; Carly Ward from Young Entrepreneurs Society, the team at Start Your Business magazine, the lovely men from Crunch (who gave us a mug each!).

By Friday I was frazzled but felt so fired up with new ideas that I was in the office for 7am! Best time of the day to get things done I find. I usually spend the first hour writing blogs and researching pending articles and I have to confess that it’s my favorite task!

Now Friday evening could have gone one or two ways. I had reached the final of the NetworkShe Awards as “Networking Woman of the Year”, (which will come as a surprise to no one as I spend so long doing it) but I also had a long standing engagement to have Dinner and Conversation with the wonderful Joanne Harris. I figured that I just couldn’t cancel the dinner as a good friend of mine (Michelle Hodgson of Key Words copy fame) had made all the arrangements, and truth be told having recently watched Chocolat for the 100th time I felt duty bound to go see, eat with and chat to an author that I had been stalking on the quiet for many years. And the evening was lovely. Joanne is a very funny, entertaining speaker who answered our questions with honesty and was quite open about where she finds her inspiration from, how little control she had over film rights and how influential her own daughter has been in nagging her to complete the latest Rune novel!

There was an awkward moment (for me anyway) where you actually meet someone who you have admired from a far and suddenly they’re very real and sat in front of you – I’m sure she didn’t notice. Still, it was an awesome way to end the week.

 

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13
Oct
How have we missed an entire generation?

In the news yesterday there was outrage at the recent unemployment figures, 2.57 million unemployed – the highest in 17 years.

“Disappointing” said one Mr Cameron. Wrong word Mr Cameron, you meant to say “Disgusting” surely?

Just under a million of the unemployed are aged between 16 – 24 years old. Radio One interviewed a 19 year old boy who had worked hard at school, left with 14 GCSE’s (12 A Grades) but has not had a single months paid work since leaving, and not for lack of trying. He doesn’t know what it’s like to get up every morning with a job to go to, learn real life skills, socialise with work colleagues, or even what a monthly payslip looks like.

How incredible is that? And he’s not alone. But that’s not my point.

I hear so much about teaching entrepreneurship and how we should encourage school children to become their own boss, start their own business (from as young as 13 for goodness sake!) but what about the kids we’ve missed? There’s an entire generation who won’t be passing on the lessons that we learnt from our parents. They won’t see their parents getting up each morning, every morning and having somewhere to go i.e. work.

So where’s the rallying cry for the 1 million 16 – 24 year old unemployed Prime Minister? Where does that fit in with your Big Society exactly? Your ‘plan’ isn’t working so we absolutely must retract from it, and rapidly.

I can’t give you the solution, I can point out the obvious massive flaws; SME’s aren’t generating enough cash revenue to recruit despite how desperate they might be to cut down on the hours they work, banks….. well we all know the score there. When does the Quantitative Easing come into play exactly? When will banks start opening their doors again to give the SME the cash they so desperately need to build, buy and sell their products or services, who in turn can then employ?

I only hope that all those budding 13 year old entrepreneurs aren’t given a rude awakening when it comes to surviving in the real world. I sincerely hope that in 3 years time when they are due to leave school that they leave millionaires and employ all those poor unfortunate youths that had the audacity of being born too bloody early.

Category: On reflection  Leave a Comment
13
Oct
5k Sundays

Back in March this year I, like many other women took part in the Race for Life. My family has been touched massively by cancer, including my older cousin Collene – in who’s memory I raced for.

So, this year I completed the 5k in 47 minutes, as a walker and I was chuffed to bits with my little self! I raised £200 for cancer research. I now want to make this an annual event, but this time I’m actually going to train!

I joined Bannatynes gym and I actually enjoy going to the gym. I need to speak to a trainer though and get a specific routine worked out for next years race.

I’ve never really been the sporty type but in the last couple of weeks I’ve Yoga (with much hilarity) Aerobic dancing (again, hilarious) and tonight I’m going to try Tai Chi, with Mark – at least then the 2 of us can make arses of ourselves!

I’ll report back and let you know how it goes!

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07
Jan
Bless me Father for I have sinned……..
It’s been, well a long time since my last confession.
You see I’m an addict, I can’t help it, and the more I ‘do it’ the more I want it. Sometimes it can be up to 10 times a day!
Where do I find the time you’re wondering? After years of experimenting I’ve discovered that it doesn’t have to be long or take much time, in fact the shorter the better (length wise).
Planning ahead helps, saves awkward conversations later on when there’s a dry patch, when I just can’t get into it no matter how hard I try.
I’m not sure when or how it started but I can remember where – my kitchen table. Most things do with me. Or was it in the bath?
I can remember my first time too. It was a complete revelation  & an instant high, the satisfaction ran bone deep and I can still get that today – in fact right now if I’m honest!
Have you worked out what it is yet? Will you help to fuel my addiction?………please?
Category: Head of Words  Leave a Comment
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